For some reason, a low price seems to encourage lack of thinking. I put a piece of furniture for sale on a classifieds website. I priced the object well below what other similar objects were priced because I do not really care if I get any money for it. I do care about getting it removed from the house before I move, because if I do not I will have to pay to have it removed.

Within minutes I had several people offering to buy the object. Which is wonderful! So then I asked the first respondent what the plan was to remove it.  Many hours later this person got back to me saying a friend had a truck.

In the mean time, a half-dozen more people joined the queue.

I asked for a confirmation that the friend would be able to commit to picking up the couch. The next morning (12+ hours later) I sent a follow-up request for a confirmation. And I got an e-mail a few hours after that saying I had better go on to the next person because a confirmation was not forthcoming.

In the mean time, more than a dozen more people had joined the queue.

The second person had no way to get a truck. The third person called me twice after I asked them not to call, so I removed them from the queue (and they too ‘had a friend with a truck’, which I never trust.)

Fourth person had tried to bribe me to let them jump the queue. Twice. This person had promised to come get the sofa right away, was ready to go. After contacting them saying their turn had come up, they wanted to know if the sofa could be disassembled, and what were the dimensions again? Admittedly it had been nearly a day ago, but as they did not come back with a confirmation…

By this time I was no longer adding people to the queue whose contact included a question of whether I could deliver. The queue was still growing, despite editing the ad to say there were more than 10 people waiting. I removed my phone number to stop my phone from ringing (people who could not read the “Do not call”) and pinging “SMS: is your sofa still available?” (if the ad is still up, it is still available. Sort of.)

Fifth person says they can pick up on Friday; they have a UHaul. I explain that I expect an appointment between 10 and 13, but what time outside that would work best? Noon. No, that will not work as I expect to be away from home at some point between 10 a.m. and 1 p.m.; before or after this would work but not during. Okay, 1 p.m.. <forehead smack> Fine, 1 p.m., even if I have to scamper out of the appointment early.

The queue is somewhere north of 25 people, 20 more people waiting for at least 2 more days to see if this person actually does arrive with a rental truck at 13:00.  Two more days of leaving this advertisement live because it has not yet actually sold and left the property.

Of the first 5 people none were prepared to actually come pick it up when they offered to buy it. The 5th is making me wait 72 hours. And I have no idea which of the (now 27, while writing this) rest actually has a truck either. No, I know one of them has a cargo van.

Next classified there are going to be better ground rules. If you cannot come get it within 12-24 hours of your first offer, I move on to the next person. And maybe less fairness.